Stars lighten up the dark sky

感情

2011-04-26T23:01:00.001+08:00

一段感情要白头偕老并不是必然的... 两个不同的人在一起，相爱，相处，谈何容易？有几对夫妻可以在结婚数十年后还能说深爱着对方？有些人结婚没几年就已经说对对方没感情了，但他们是否有努力过？爱，不是偶然的，更不是必然的... 感情是要每天珍惜对方，用力爱护对方，接受对方的好与不好... 如果把对方为你做的当做理所当然，对对方诸多要求，你永远都不会满意这个伴侣的... 幸福是需要付出代价的，不是从天而降的...

心痛

2011-03-13T01:33:00.001+08:00

跟他那么久了，在他心里我站的是什么位置？在他生命里我扮演的是什么角色？他是否有考虑过我的感受？为他的付出，我没要回报。只希望他能看得到，感受得到。我是哪里还做得不够好？我知道，这路是我必须走的。我一定会好好的把它走完。

what am i doing?

2011-02-01T22:07:00.001+08:00

What on earth am I doing? Do I have to go through this? Why should I tolerate his temper? Who does he think he is? Why must everything be done his way? I already told him tt I needed to go ikea to buy things and I am waiting for the peak hour to pass so tt I can take cab... I appreciate his effort to come fetch me but it's not my fault tt the trip was delayed due to some undecidables... Wait for awhile will die is it? Give me attitude for what? If he had a bad day today, so did I... I won't have made the trip to ikea if I had the choice... I know tt he is thinking for me but what good does it make by throwing his temper on me? Pissed off... Super very pissed off and very hurt... His mood swing is super severe...

silly

2011-01-31T01:26:00.001+08:00

He keep asking me to think if one day he leave me, will I be angry, will I be sad, will I a lot of things... I said no bcos it's his choice... How to tell him? It's bcos I truly love him....

donno

2011-01-31T00:10:00.001+08:00

At the end of the day still have to blog back here... There are still things I don't want him to know... Sometimes I really feel quite lost... Don't really know if what I am doing is right or not... Sometimes I really feel tt I'm wasting my time... I wish someone can give me an answer...

The Proposal...

2009-08-30T10:12:00.002+08:00

29 August 2009, 10.45pm, Queen Elizebeth Park.

This is the place where we had our second date. Many memories started here as well. We went to Jack's Place for dinner and came over to the park. We were talking about many memories, when we first started. I saw it coming, I could feel that he was very nervous. He took out some water, glitter and light. It was actually quite funny when he took extremely long to prepare himself, I could almost hear his heartbeat from beside him and he even start to stammer. Finally, it came. He started singing "窗外开始下起毛毛雨，运遮住了星星。。。" Before I knew it, he was on his knees and he had a ring. Just as he ask "你愿意嫁给我吗？", my tears started to flow. It's a very strange feeling. It's very happy, totally overjoyed. Though I thought that I am already prepared, knowing that it was going to happen, but when it finally came, I still can't hold back my tears - of joy. When he put the ring on my finger, I felt like as though I am already married to him. The whole emotion is just so magical.

P.S. Thanks dear, you really made this day very special for me.

Wedding Preparation...

2009-08-27T08:39:00.002+08:00

Went to the Zoo over the weekend... Really like it there... Most prob will be holding my wedding there... hee... a bit crazy... but I want sth really different from everybody else... will have a bazzare march in... hee... date set to be 10 Oct 2010... so excited... planning my trip to Taiwan now... should be going in Apr next year for my photo shoot... so many things to think about, so many things to plan... but so happy...

SP Lecturer - unbelieveable

2009-07-16T11:53:00.003+08:00

The call I made to SP really makes me wonder what kind of student the school is producing with this kind of lecturer. Mr. Ronald, from the Business school, was the name. My company is currently looking into hiring some 50 hotel & travel consultants and I happen to know that SP has this Diploma in Tourism and Resort Management so I thought it might be a relevant qualification for this position that I am looking for. So I called up the school to find out more about the modules that teach. Well, I was put through to Mr. Ronald who is suppose to be one of the lecturers teaching this course and to my amaze, his response was unbelieveable. I asked about the GDS (Global Distribution System) that the students are being taught and he said that they do not teach this. When I probe further, he then said that they only teach very fundamental Amadeus. His reasons were that the students are taught to be managers, not to be doing the ground work. He quoted examples that they teach students, not to be waiters but to be managers of the restaurant, not to be tour agent in travel agencies but to be managers of these agencies. I wonder, before he even say all these, had he thought about what he was saying. Does he even know, how many fresh graduates, be it diploma or degree, start their very first job as a manager? If a manager don't even know how to do the ground work, how can he/she even qualify to be a manager? Just by the paper qualification? I seriously do not think so. Maybe he does not understand what it means by a servant-leader. Only those who go to the lowest to be humble, to serve, qualify to be a leader or a manager in the corporate context. I really got me worried of the future generation of Singaporeans being taught these kind of mentality that they educated to be managers. Well, I can just say that I doubt they will be at all good as a manager if they do not know how to be in the shoe of the people they are managing to understand what they go through. Mr. Ronald, I hope you can look into the way you speak. Leaving a bad impression of your school, staff and student is doing your students no good at all considering that I could have been their potential employer.

我要结婚了。。。

2009-06-10T14:49:00.002+08:00

我要结婚了。。。好开心哦。。。真的很兴奋。。。婚期还没定，但已经签了到台湾去拍婚纱照的配套了。。。明年三月底会去。。。星期日会到Sentosa去看Wedding Venue。。。想定在Rasa Sentosa。。。想办一个海边的婚礼。。。现在在忙着找鞋子。。。结婚应该穿怎样的鞋子呢？好像有很多事情要办。。。床和衣橱也都还没找。。。还有戒指。。。我的妈呀。。。好忙但是好开心。。。好期待。。。不知从什么时候开始，突然变得很Virgo。。。突然很注意很多很小的细节。。。有时会觉得有点不可思议。。。我真的要结婚了吗？想要做一个漂亮的新娘。。。不知道还需要做什么，就是觉得有好多事情要做。。。又担心露了什么，忽略了什么。。。好像有点想太多了。。。哈哈。。。

对不起。。。

2009-05-24T19:33:00.002+08:00

我做了一件让我男友很伤心的事。。。我不知道我该怎么办。。。还有重来的机会吗？我知道他很爱我。。。我也知道他为了我付出了很多。。。但是我还是伤害了他。。。我真得很抱歉。。。真的觉得很难过。。。真的好讨厌我自己。。。怎么可以？我到底为什么？我真的好后悔。。。千不该，万不该，就是不该伤害我最爱的人。。。我现在到底该怎么办？还可以弥补吗？

九十九次我爱他

2009-04-10T14:15:00.001+08:00

保加利亚玫瑰的精油
全滴在他刚才牵过我的手
横冲直撞我的心像一颗躲避球
谁懂爱停在手里多久
学问道理教科书都有
恋爱上上签到底哪里求
如果有教授我一定要努力修
丘比特呀快为我加油
多想带着雷达到他梦里仔细调查
爱的正卡还有没有副卡
也想拿起扫把在他心底洗洗刷刷
不专心的念头
哎咿哎咿都清除啦
九十九次我爱他
少了眼皮会乱眨
要他能心电感应我的想法
每天念着他的名字
哎咿哎咿一句不差
九十九次我爱他
少了头发会分岔
要他的想念每天准时打卡
爱像冰淇淋在嘴里溶化

我只能爱你

2009-03-28T09:15:00.002+08:00

当你握紧我的手
我决定和你走
经历再多的挫折
也绝对不退缩
当河流都倒流
我还在你左右
一直陪伴你到时间的尽头
就算有一天
天和地都会分离
也永远不离也不弃
要和你在一起
呜~~~~~~~~~~~~
为了你我可以
因为爱你我只能爱你
生命荡涤轮回里
你是唯一不忘的记忆
真正的爱过
才算真正的活过
爱你从此绝不会放手

不曾褪色的承诺
比永久还要久
痛过哭过也恨过
从未想放弃过
莫问我要理由
爱就是我所有
今生来世你是不变的守候
就算全世界
都要来与你为敌
也还要紧紧抱着你
泪不会掉一滴
呜~~~~~~~~~~~~
为了你我可以
因为爱你我只能爱你
只要为你我愿意
牺牲一切都不觉可惜
真正的爱过才算真正的活过
爱你从此再无他所求

死性不改

2009-02-27T20:45:00.002+08:00

再见了我的宠爱
谁愿接受这种意外
你赞我天生可爱
不愿看着我离开
同伴也话我傻
喜欢受挫
宁愿情敌在伤我
人天生根本都不可以爱死身边的一个
无奈你最够刺激我
凡事也治倒我
几多黑心的教唆
我亦捱得过
来煽风来点火
就击倒我么
谁恋爱就多障碍
死性我不想改
如我没有你的爱
我没法活得来
情人的存在
是我从来都志在
能在我拱手让爱

我怕可一不可再
难道你被爱都有害
我确信天真不会错
威力会移山填海
同伴也话我傻
喜欢受挫
宁愿情敌在伤我
人天生根本都不可以爱死身边的一个
无奈你最够刺激我
凡事也治倒我
几多黑心的教唆
我亦捱得过
来煽风来点火
就击倒我么
谁恋爱就多障碍
死性我不想改
如我没有你的爱
我没法活得来
情人的存在
是我从来都志在
能在我拱手让爱

人天生根本都不可以爱死身边的一个
无奈你最够刺激我
凡事也治倒我
几多黑心的教唆
我亦捱得过
来煽风来点火
就击倒我么
谁恋爱就多障碍
死性我不想改
如我没有你的爱
我没法活得来
情人的存在
是我从来都志在
能在我拱手让爱

非你莫属

2009-02-06T13:12:00.000+08:00

懂得让我微笑的人
再没有谁比你有天份
轻易闯进我的心门
明天的美梦你完成
整个宇宙浩瀚无边的尽头
每颗渺小星球
全都绕着你走
爱我非你莫属
我只愿守护
由你给我的幸福
爱我非你莫属
也许会笑着哭
但那人是你所以
不怕苦
懂得让我流泪的人
给的感动一定是最深
在我心中留下伤痕
你同时点亮了星辰
整个宇宙浩瀚无边的尽头
每颗渺小星球
全都绕着你走
爱我非你莫属
我只愿守护
由你给我的幸福
爱我非你莫属
也许会笑着哭
但那人是你所以
不怕苦
看那麽多相遇
偏偏只和你
天造地设般产生奇迹
哦我心的缝隙
我想除了你
任谁也无法填补这空虚
爱我非你莫属
我只愿守护
由你给我的幸福
爱我非你莫属
也许会笑着哭
但那人是你所以
不怕苦
但那人是你所以
不怕苦

X'mas...

2008-12-22T21:34:00.002+08:00

I think... This is the best x'mas I ever had in my life... Although the actual day is still 3 more days away, I am already enjoying myself... Went Orchard with Steve and took many photo... Had gift exchange at office and buffet... Have been decorating my office since weeks ago... Spent one day wrapping present for all my staff today... So fun, so happy... can really feel the x'mas atmosphere all around me... and I see more deco going up on the call floor for the deco competition... so exciting... and I am thinking what I should wear to office on x'mas eve for the best dress competition... haha... well... though I can't participate in any of the competition, it's still very exciting to be part of it... no mood to work... :) furthermore, what I need to do i think is mission impossible... good thing that x'mas is coming so can distract me a bit for the very low low mood...

Also, I am really anticipating what my darling boyfriend will be giving me for x'mas... he refuse to tell me even a single hint lor... hmmm... will be going orchard again maybe tmr... so happy... hope can spend the 12pm moment with my bf... :)

小酒窝。。。

2008-10-18T10:49:00.002+08:00

我还在寻找
一个依靠和一个拥抱
谁替我祈祷替我烦恼
为我生气为我闹
幸福开始有预兆
缘分让我们慢慢紧靠
然后孤单被吞没了
无聊变得有话聊有变化了

小酒窝长睫毛
是你最美的记号
我每天睡不着想念你的微笑
你不知道你对我多么重要
有了你生命完整的刚好
小酒窝长睫毛
迷人得无可救药
我放慢了步调
感觉像是喝醉了
终于找到心有灵犀的美好
一辈子暖暖的好
我永远爱你到老

幸福开始有预兆
缘分让我们慢慢紧靠
然后孤单被吞没了
无聊变得有话聊有变化了

小酒窝长睫毛
是你最美的记号
我每天睡不着想念你的微笑
你不知道你对我多么重要
有了你生命完整的刚好
小酒窝长睫毛
迷人得无可救药
我放慢了步调
感觉像是喝醉了
终于找到心有灵犀的美好
一辈子暖暖的好
我永远爱你到老

小酒窝长睫毛
迷人得无可救药
我放慢了步调
感觉像是喝醉了
终于找到心有灵犀的美好
一辈子暖暖的好
我永远爱你到老

Crazy...

2008-10-09T16:16:00.002+08:00

I am going crazy... What on earth do you want? Can you even accept that everybody is different and unique? I can never be like you... what kind of expectation is that? you want me to say what you wanna hear when I don't even know what is it tt you wanna hear in the first place... then you keep asking me how much I understand you... you say tt I am very rude, very fierce... tt I am giving you the wrong impression of things... blah blah blah... do you even have a mirror at home? can I give you half a dozen to put around your house? before you complain tt I am like this and like tt, can you please take a look at yourself first? I think you have no right to demand for a change in me when you yourself is the same... I am really sick and tired of having to do everything to suit you, to suit what you like... I even have to talk to you the way you like it?! this is not me... if you wanna like me, like me for who I am... everytime when I ask you things, your answers always go round and round until I oso donno what on earth you are talking about... I am really tired of having to figure everything out on my own and then still have to be accused of not trying to understand... u go ahead and do what you like... u are free now... I shall not bother you anymore... you wanna find someone who wants to settle down but you yourself is not ready to settle down... you demand the sky of others but you don't even look at where you are... I won't deny tt I really enjoyed the times we had together... every single moment was very precious to me... but apparently, I am making your life very miserable and tiring... so... I shan't be so cruel to the person I love... just do what you like ok... you are free...

21st Birthday...

2008-09-30T09:25:00.003+08:00

Thanks to all who have made my 21st Birthday possible and memorable... Special thanks to my dearest boyfriend who see me through from the beginning to the end... Thanks for all the energy to help me pump up so many balloons... For helping me prepare all the bbq stuff... For helping my bros start the fire... For doing most of the bbq for everyone... For staying through to help me clear everything... I really loved all the gifts I've gotten... Be it big or small... They are all special to me... Thanks everyone... :)

小夫妻

2008-09-20T21:35:00.002+08:00

在 super market逛了好大一圈
想你爱咖哩或是义大利面
幸福的食谱再恶补几遍
我的优点要你百尝不厌
在下班路上租了几支影片
有你在沙发就是浪漫剧院
辛苦的时候想著你的脸
没有蛮牛活力也会出现
喔~序妻我的福气
这辈子可以让我爱上了你
这一路有时晴有时雨都没有关系
我们的真心超过钻石对爱的定义
序妻永不放弃
默契是最富有的一种储蓄
赌气话你一句我一句也觉得甜蜜
多庆幸我们望著
同样明天牵手在努力

你今天玉米浓汤有一点咸
你没送钻戒以后补我项鍊
我的通通是你的没有期限
存够钱我们逛地球一圈

我愿意这一生这一世呵护著你
一直到你当爷爷你当奶奶
还是老夫老妻

Jobs...

2008-09-10T15:55:00.002+08:00

Have not been updating for some time... Just joined Sitel Singapore as HR Officer - Talent Acquisition... Love this job... Well... Its a call centre... Huge call centre... Has operation in over 20 countries... Anyone interested to work in call centre as telemarketer, telesales, customer service or business development specialist call me ok... Or if you have friends interested, you can refer them and you will get a referrer fee... :) Currently looking for Australian or people who has stayed in Australia before to do B2B telemarketing... If you know anyone do give me a call or drop a comment in my blog... :)

Limit...

2008-08-25T16:54:00.002+08:00

I think I am reaching my limit... I am not sure how long more I can live with this... Maybe my mentality is different from yours... To me, the moment I decided that you are my one, you are family to me... my family thinks the same way as well... we speak of you like one of us... we include you like one of us... maybe 是我自作多情... you have not thought of me like a family... I am just an outsider... someone maybe close but not close enough... Sunday is family day... so I cannot be included... even if we can only meet once a week, its still not enough to meet on Sunday... cycling is more important than me... tennis, boardgames and friends are more important than me... next time when u have things to say, go tell ur friends... since they are worth ur entire Saturday while I am not... when u have heartaches at work, go tell ur family... since they are so important, they can jolly well listen to you... I do not need to supply pleasure and be treated with no importance... go and tell ur friends and family to help u save money... I do not need to do that...

"How important a person is in your life is equivalent to the amount of time you spend with the person" - Rev. Kong Hee

Stable... Unstable...

2008-08-17T13:00:00.002+08:00

I am not very sure what to do... You want me to tell you me feelings, the things I am going through... But when I actually tell you, you say that I will drive you away by being so unstable... I am not sure how you define stability... if telling you my thoughts and feelings is being unstable, if having to breakdown once in a while is being unstable... then I really don't know what is stable... tt's also why I asked you if I can not put up a strong front when with you... If stability means I will not come to you crying in the middle of the night, will not complain to you bout this and that, will not tell you what is going through my mind or bothering me... fine... I can deal with my own instability... I can cry on my own, can complain to my bear, can talk to some other people... If what you really want of me is just stability, I can do that... I can always put up a strong front and be happy all the time I am with you... Just so that you won't keep saying that my instability will drive you away...

Romance...

2008-08-12T21:57:00.004+08:00

Went to fullerton to watch fireworks on national day with bf... It was so beautiful... So touched by the effort to get me to a nice spot to watch the fireworks though I know you really don't like crowds at all... wonderful time spent together... :)

2008-08-01T11:39:00.002+08:00

Your stories are getting less and less interesting... and your excuses are getting lamer... I am getting kinda tired of entertaining you, trying to act as though I understand... I trust my senses and I know that they are right... not saying anything does not mean that I do not know anything... I try to be understanding but I hope that you don't go overboard... I choose to trust you for now doesn't mean that it will last for long... sometimes some things is I don't wanna make a big fuss bout them but I know very well what they meant... the absence of certain normal expectations... the reluctance of basic actions... pieced together, they all mean something... I know very well that I am not expecting too much... In fact, you know very well that I am being extremely understanding already... I am not sure where we are heading to...

朋友说。。。

2008-07-27T22:16:00.002+08:00

曾经有个朋友跟我说过。。。地球不会因我的难过而停止转动。。。时间也不会因我的不开心而停止。。。只要深呼吸，告诉自己，明天会更好。。。闭上眼睛，笑一笑，所有的不开心都可以忘记掉。。。我刚式了。。。还挺不错的。。。:)

完美。。。

2008-07-27T21:18:00.002+08:00

请你不要只想到你不喜欢我的怎样怎样。。。我也有不满意你的地方，只是没说出来而已。。。请不要整天觉得自己很棒，你并没有那么完美。。。If I can live with you imperfection, I hope you too can live with mine...

Expectations...

2008-07-27T20:39:00.002+08:00

Unrealistic expectations... Of u and of me... Please don't expect me to know what you know... I have not been through what u had... The time u have spent on earth is already half more than me... naturally the things tt u have seen, heard, experienced will be much more than me... no point keep saying, telling me tt I'm childish, immature, etc... It only hurts me... For people my age, I am already considered mature... u want me to grow up... fine... give me time... by the time I'm ur age I would have known what u know but then again, u would have been through even more by then... and stop telling me tt I am so gal... I am a gal... and if I can't even be gal to u then who? unless u mean u rather I be gal to other ppl... if I can't even 撒娇 to u then why do I need a boyfriend for? I need a shoulder, not another mother... I don't need u to lecture me regarding this and tt... I know tt u know a lot... but don't u think tt its also good for me to go through life for myself? it will be good enough if u can be alongside me to go though life with me... to encourage me when I am down, to help me up when I fall... to share my victories and defeats... 我知道你是想保护我，但在保护下成长的可能就没有那么坚强了。。。

I just need to know...

我可以依赖你吗？
我可以依靠你吗？
你能让我托付终生吗？
你能让我偶尔跟你耍耍脾气，撒撒娇吗？
Can you let me go through life with you and you with me? Through all the big and small?

Story...

2008-07-23T10:07:00.002+08:00

在一个平凡的早晨，她依旧在一般的时间起床。那天早晨，因为沉重的心情而没吃早餐。她搭着公车，和平常一样的往上班的路上。坐在公车上的她，望着窗外，看着细雨，轻轻地从天上飘落，心里不禁感到一点失落。

心里的空虚，不知何时，已经在心里慢慢的浮现。以前唱过的歌，不断地在耳边环绕着。他的身影也不自觉地出现在眼前。她突然想起，昨晚出现在梦里的人，不晓得是否也是他。这几天，她似乎都在问自己同一些问题，同一些不知该怎么回答的问题。“这个决定真的做对了吗？如果对了为何还会如此空虚？在恋爱的人不都应该是甜蜜的吗？刚开始恋爱的人不都是形影不离的吗？为何如果我不找他，他也不会主动找我？或许是我的要求太多了吧。”

在上班的一路上，电车里都是一些正赶着去上班的上班族。有的在看报子，有的在翻资料。她的心里却在想着他，想他不知睡醒了没有，也在赶着去上班吗？不晓得他今天的心情是如何，好想打给他，又担心会烦到他。这种矛盾的心情不知还要持续多久。她对他的想念，也一天天的加深。

Lady Boss...

2008-07-15T11:53:00.000+08:00

Working for my Godma now... Slack lah... Nth much to do... Do my own things... enjoy... but nvr work no money lol... a bit boring for a first day... At least no one to scream at me here... own time own target... like to work, work... don't like to work, don't work... not sure yet if I'll really like this kind of life... well... so far so good... sleepy... wanna go home and slp... so sad dear dear working if not can come and accompany me... :)

Pondering...

2008-07-12T14:28:00.002+08:00

Should I? Should I not? Can't decide... Seems good but know tt it will not be tt easy... much more commitment, much more responsibilities, much more things to do... forseeable longer working hours, though more flexible... learning everything from scratch... hmmm...

You...

2008-07-10T11:20:00.002+08:00

You... Yes, you... No need to think so much... I am talking to you... Why u always know exactly what to say to make me feel comfortable again? Why I have not even say anything and u already know everything? Why u always know what to do to make my heart beat and make my heart stop? Why you can make me laugh at the slightest things? Why just simply thinking of you can keep me smiling for the whole day? Why I can become so understanding for your everything? Why you always know what qns to ask me or what to tell me to keep me thinking of you for the whole day and night? :)

慌。。。

2008-07-08T22:35:00.002+08:00

不知道为什么。。。心里有点不安。。。甚至有点慌。。。即使身体再不舒服，再累，也不能睡。。。因为心里的不舒服要更严重得多。。。突然间对自己完全没有信心。。。总觉得你对她的在乎是乎多了一点。。。有一时间找不到你，心里突然有点慌。。。突然觉得你好像不属于我的。。。想不到办法找你。。。心里的寒风有一点叫人忍受不了。。。身边少了你的温度，是乎有些不习惯。。。可能是我太敏感了吧。。。不是对你没信心。。。是对自己没信心。。。完全没有把握，我是否留得住你。。。天空突然乌云密布。。。好像要下雨了。。。已经十一点了。。。你到底在哪里？在做什么？你至少也该回我一个电话啊。。。心好乱。。。不知道自己在想什么。。。已经打给你无数次了。。。都是转到留音信箱。。。我真的不喜欢这种感觉。。。

Fired my manager...

2008-07-01T15:45:00.003+08:00

Just fired my manager last Saturday for being such an asshole... Never met someone like this before... So like to scold ppl for no good reason... Think he can threaten me... Fat hope... Fired him right in his face... Boss called but told her tt I won't stay... Think can bully me... No way... Looking for job now... Really enjoy myself for now... :) staying at home... doing things tt I like but haven't have the time to do... really, seriously thinking about my future... what I really wanna do... also not very sure wat kind of job I'll really like... maybe will still have to try out... Government? MNC? Hmmm... Maybe try sth different... now tt I still got the chance to be jumping around... :) went back to office today to collect my pay and belongings... heard tt a designer quitting too... haha... horrible company... maybe not the company... juz tt one manager... but wat to do... he is the next in line to the boss... heard tt the other two designers also leaving soon... haha... the accountant says she still thinking bout it... haha... jia lat... everybody leaving... anyway... ...

我的你。。。

2008-06-27T11:59:00.002+08:00

我看着你。。。

工作好辛苦。。。

看到你好累。。。

好心痛。。。

想要为你做点什么。。。

不知道能为你做些什么。。。

只能尽量不吵你。。。

不烦你。。。

希望你能多休息。。。

希望你能睡得好一点。。。

喜欢你。。。想你。。。

2008-06-25T17:29:00.001+08:00

喜欢你。。。

很喜欢你。。。

非常喜欢你。。。

非常非常喜欢你。。。

想你。。。

很想你。。。

非常想你。。。

非常非常想你。。。

不爽。。。

2008-06-24T12:48:00.003+08:00

Although you've already spoken to me, I still not very happy... 很谢谢你教我该怎么做，但是人家是要你安慰嘛。。。原本只是想要撒娇一下而已。。。哪知道在你面前就变得没有想象中坚强。。。讲到人家的眼泪都快流出来了。。。:) 没事了。。。也该学着长大，懂事了。。。

Panda...

2008-06-24T10:41:00.002+08:00

Yay... Watched my Kung Fu Panda yesterday... First movie with you wor... I enjoyed myself so much... Thanks dear... You kept your word even though you were like half dead already... 真的很感动。。。You never fail to surprise me with all sorts of funny and weird nonsense... the picture this morning really shook me... but I am very touched by what you are willing to share with me... :)

JB Jesco...

2008-06-22T19:29:00.002+08:00

Juz came back from JB... The shopping mall there is sooo big... was shopping myself crazy... juz in time to curb my shopping crave... bought quite a lot of things but spent less than SGD 150... shiok... the food there also... very good... so yummy... but if no car go there a bit problem... not so chaotic as I thought... I wanna go again... should be going again first week July... haha... more shopping... :) realized tt I haven't been shopping for really long... the last time I shopped was more than two months ago... haiz... busy life... inaccessible also... but now can go JB shop... better... value for money... haha... movie there also very cheap lah... 11 RM per person... huge screen... the seat and sound all quite good one... my dear, still owe me Kung Fu Panda right... hee... ;)

心跳。。。

2008-06-15T19:01:00.002+08:00

喜欢你已经不是一点点。。。

跟你在一起时，心几乎忘了跳。。。

喜欢你牵我的手。。。

喜欢你抱着我。。。

喜欢你对我的小心翼翼。。。

喜欢你对我的在乎。。。

喜欢你对我的紧张。。。

喜欢你对我的体贴。。。

喜欢你有时的古怪。。。

喜欢你有时的耍赖。。。

就连在欺负我的时候，还能让我更喜欢你。。。

喜欢你在呼我对你的想法。。。

喜欢你总爱逗我笑。。。

在我不开心的时候，只要听到你的声音，就会笑。。。

你的点点滴滴总是不断地浮现在我眼前。。。

让我无时无刻都在想你。。。

你的调皮捣蛋，总是让我不知道应该生气，还是应该笑。。。

在你怀里的时候，总希望时间能停留在那一刻，直到天荒地老。。。

跟你在一起的时间总是过得太快。。。

只要有你在，一切都无所谓。。。

我的你。。。

2008-06-11T23:18:00.002+08:00

我的你温柔，体贴。。。

You always seem to know what to do and what to say...

你对我的小心翼翼。。。

你对我的呵护。。。

你对我的担心，关心。。。

一点一滴的累积在我的心里。。。

属于。。。

2008-06-09T21:03:00.002+08:00

要我属于你。。。要做我的守护天使。。。

喜欢属于你。。。喜欢你做我的守护天使。。。

整夜没睡也不会很累。。。只要想起你，就会忘了累。。。

你的点点滴滴，不断在我眼前浮现。。。

缺氧...

2008-06-09T20:59:00.000+08:00

春天慢慢一点点发芽
快乐开始都有了想像
城市光合作用的模样
幸福开始组装
把这首歌送给老婆刘昱言
夜里满园的茉莉花香
月光洒落看不见忧伤
旋转木马前那个广场
爱情开始滋长
想你有时会缺氧
嘴角不自觉上扬
这是不是幸福的现象
胸口微微的发烫
想你有时会缺氧
脸红呼吸不正常
这是不是幸福的症状
不知不觉又缺氧
夜里满园的茉莉花香
月光洒落看不见忧伤
旋转木马前那个广场
爱情开始滋长
想你有时会缺氧
为何呼息不正常
这是不是幸福的症状
不知不觉又缺氧
无法移动的梦想
就算没有人鼓掌
我也不会受伤
不会稀释的信仰
心穿越砖墙
在你的身旁
想你有时会缺氧
嘴角不自觉上扬
这是不是幸福的症状
胸口微微的发烫
为何呼息不正常
不知不觉又缺氧

恋人未满...

2008-06-08T16:53:00.002+08:00

为什么只和你能聊一整夜
为什么才道别就又想再见面
在朋友里面就数你最特别
总让我觉得很亲很贴
为什么你在意谁陪我逛街
为什么你担心谁对我放电
你说你对我比别人多一些
却又不说是多哪一些
友达以上
恋人未满
甜蜜心烦
愉悦混乱
我们以后
会变怎样
我迫不及待想知道答案
再靠近一点点
就让你牵手
再勇敢一点点
我就跟你走
你还等什么
时间已经不多
再下去
只好只做朋友
再向前一点点
我就会点头
再冲动一点点
我就不闪躲
不过三个字
别犹豫这么久
只要你说出口
你就能拥有我
为什么你寂寞只想要我陪
为什么我难过只肯让你安慰
我们心里面
明明都有感觉
为什么不敢面对
我不相信
都动了感情却到不了爱情
那么贴心却进不了心底
你能不能快一点决定
对我说我爱你

你知道吗？

2008-06-08T14:23:00.002+08:00

你知道吗？只要跟喜欢的人在一起，即使是做很简单的事，如吃饭，走走，看电影也能很快乐，很满足。。。只要跟喜欢的人在一起，即使是吃路边坦也会很美味。。。即使是在人潮汹涌的地方，也只能看见你。。。即使在很吵闹的地方，也只能听到你的声音。。。做什么，去哪里根本不重要。。。重要的是跟谁在一起。。。

不知道在你眼里的我是个怎么样的人。。。不知道要怎样抚平你心里的伤。。。也不知道要怎样给你你需要的安全感。。。因为受了伤，所以在自己周围起了墙。。。在要保护自己的同时，也不让别人进入你的世界里。。。

告诉他。。。

2008-06-08T12:19:00.003+08:00

把心里的话告诉他了。。。

也不知道接下来他会怎么做。。。

如果真的cannot work out就当朋友就好啊。。。

我真的不想给你这种无形的压力。。。

走一步算一步吧。。。

Hmmm...

2008-06-07T18:36:00.002+08:00

总是要我迁就你的时间。。。

迁就了你的时间还要我想要去哪里，要做什么。。。

Hmmm...

当心有人近水楼台先得月哦。。。

Tired...

2008-06-05T19:05:00.001+08:00

Super tired...

Tmr exam now still in office... Aarrgghh.... Brain over-worked today... thinking of so many things at the same time... going home soon... slp...

矛盾。。。

2008-06-05T10:57:00.002+08:00

Send me home again yesterday... Fetch me to work this morning and breakfast together...

怎么办？

喜欢的人不努力。。。

努力的人不知道能不能喜欢。。。

女人。。。男人。。。

2008-06-02T21:27:00.003+08:00

女人啊。。。

把眼睛睁大点。。。

看清楚点。。。

别因一时的感动就对男人动情。。。

男人嘛。。。

要的都是一样的。。。

他有说过喜欢你吗？

他有为你努力过吗？

可能只是空闲无聊的消遣罢了。。。

如果他不为你动心你何必为他动情？

真的动了情，最后受伤的还是自己。。。

早点放手吧。。。

在他还没进入你的心之前。。。

小手拉大手。。。

2008-06-02T09:37:00.001+08:00

还记得那场音乐会的烟火
还记得那个凉凉的深秋
还记得人潮把你推向了我
游乐园拥挤的正是时候
一个夜晚坚持不睡的等候
一起泡温泉奢侈的享受
有一次日记里愚蠢的困惑
因为你的微笑幻化成风
你大大的勇敢保护着我
我小小的关怀喋喋不休
感谢我们一起走了那么久
又再一次回到凉凉深秋
给你我的手
像温柔野兽
把自由交给草原的辽阔
我们小手拉大手
一起郊游
今天别想太多
你是我的梦
像北方的风
吹着南方暖洋洋的哀愁
今天加油向昨天挥挥手
我们一直就这样向前走

K again...

2008-05-31T11:31:00.002+08:00

Went to K with my colleagues again... haha... crazy ppl... insisted tt I must go... came all the way to my place to fetch me... sang all the way till dawn... crazy guys... take turns to down me... so not fair lor... they drink beer I drink Vodka... where got ppl drink liqueur like tt drink one? less than 1 hr already down one jug of Vodka... cannot take it... they wanted to continue but I refuse lah... spent half the time sleeping... haha... lol... then take so many pictures of ppl slp... lol... haiz... haha... then went for breakfast at Balestier at 6am... then went to office and slp... haha... some scene it was... haha... 5 zombies... haha... the other 2 went home straight... lol... then slp until 9am, went for coffee then went to site... good thing this week I no need to stay in office... JY drove me to DTE, settle a bit of things then sent me home le... not very tired really... :) really had a great time... de-stressed after 2 weeks of work... hmmm... sometimes its really very difficult to battle against fate... some ppl, you wanna ask him out, also so difficult... then when he knows tt you are out the whole night he will be worried... haiz... confused... donno wat to do... now tt my current colleagues are very playful ppl, I am concern if he might be like my ex... although as of now it doesn't seem to be the case... maybe bcos of status problem... still learning to read him... accuracy still miserably low... don even know wat on earth he is thinking... donno wat game he is playing... wanna be my hero but like don't really wanna take off like tt... confused... 对不起。。。我真的不知道你会这样担心我。。。Feel so bad now... also donno how to make up for tt...

So bored...

2008-05-30T16:17:00.002+08:00

So bored... wanna go out... wanna play... don feel like studying... haha... like small kid like tt... haha...

习惯。。。

2008-05-30T10:26:00.002+08:00

已经开始渐渐习惯。。。

可能这就是最好的安排。。。

只能远远的想着你。。。

偶尔听到你在电话里的声音。。。

这样就好吧。。。: )

Too much energy...

2008-05-24T21:13:00.002+08:00

Maybe have been having too much energy... have been thinking too much... have been caring too much... went jogging today... then did some steps... still not tired enough... still thinking... can't stop thinking... going swimming tmr morning... can't think of other ways to use up the energy... :)

游戏。。。

2008-05-23T15:15:00.001+08:00

Maybe its my turn to play my game... :)

Game...

2008-05-21T09:39:00.001+08:00

我不懂你在玩什么游戏。。。要说我不敢玩也好，玩不起也罢。。。我对你们这种无聊的游戏没有兴趣。。。

Bored...

2008-05-20T17:57:00.001+08:00

Super bored... Nth to do... waiting for time to pass... must think of sth to do tmr... sleepy... wanna slp... go show face... hmmm... unpredictable... unplannable...

下一步。。。

2008-05-19T23:06:00.002+08:00

我真得很想知道你到底在想什么。。。也很想知道我的下一步棋该怎么走。。。虽然现在这样走一步是一步地确是很exciting，但是这种excitment应该不能很久吧。。。还说什么我暗示你，我才真的需要你明示我嘞。。。其实我也不是很清楚你有没有暗示过我。。。就算是有，你的supporting evidence也太逊了吧。。。我根本都没发掘嘞。。。嗨。。。算了。。。也不及一时。。。

Mission accomplish...

2008-05-19T14:05:00.002+08:00

Cycled to East Coast Park and back... :) took lesser time than I expected... 1.5hrs to get there... feel real good now...

突然发现。。。

2008-05-18T22:19:00.002+08:00

突然发现我对你的认识，对你的了解真的很少。。。不知道你的习惯，不知道你的timetable长得什么样，不知道你有什么样的expectations。。。真的不知道很多很多。。。可能是我没问吧。。。: )

爽。。。

2008-05-17T18:28:00.002+08:00

Juz went cycling... from my house to changi beach and back... 1.5hrs... so shiok... maybe I need to be in the sun a little more... :) monday will be to east coast park... 2hrs should be enough to reach there ba... never try before... :)

动摇。。。

2008-05-17T12:01:00.002+08:00

不知道从什么时候开始，你已在我脑海里有了位置。。。可能你不知道，可能你也没感觉到，我已对你有了想念。。。希望看到你的简讯，更希望接到你的电话。。。就在二者却一之时，我无法确定。。。喜欢你的温柔，对我的小心翼翼，但却又少了一点细心。。。我不知道，有一点迷惑。。。你动摇了我的世界，让我的心跳不再平服。。。可是我却无法纵容自己，去做一个没把握的决定。。。请给我一点时间。。。

S.H.E.的“触电”。。。

请你不要太快揭开还沉默的情话
先让我多着急以下
才终于得到解答
太容易的爱故事就不耐人回味啦
像这样触电
一直甜蜜触电直到爆炸

Bored....

2008-05-16T19:17:00.001+08:00

I am like super bored now... Waiting in office for boss to come back for meeting... Zzzz...

了解。。。

2008-05-15T09:41:00.002+08:00

我了解了。。。

小心一点便是。。。

我没有你想象得那么单纯。。。: )

k...

2008-05-13T15:39:00.002+08:00

Juz watched '斗牛，要不要'... Super nice...

Went to k yesterday night... Have not been singing for some time... really enjoyed myself...

Haven't gone home so late for quite some time... :)

Had a weird dream yesterday night... Was taking to animals the whole time... Don't know what it is suppose to mean... Interesting... :)

Wondering when will the be the next time I get to spend a night like this...

Enjoying myself replaying the scenes... Reviewing every moment again and again... Not sure if I have missed something or have I added something... :)

Guessing...

2008-05-13T15:33:00.002+08:00

Guessing...

Feeling...

Enjoying...

Not knowing...

Waiting...

Assuming...

Expecting...

Anticipating...

Guadian Angel...

2008-05-10T18:16:00.003+08:00

每个女生都希望能找到自己的Guardian Angel。。。即使不在爸妈身边，还是会觉得安全。。。 Angel要会像爸一样保护她，不让她受到任何伤害。。。Angel要像妈一样呵护她，照顾她。。。在Angel的眼里，它必须要是独一无二的，是Angel的唯一。。。

Bitch...

2008-05-08T14:28:00.002+08:00

Bitch!!! Scold scold scold.... only know how to scold... can't talk properly is it??!!! Still say was cell group leader... no manners at all... no wonder CMI... some kind of christian... nvr listen properly, haven't even clarify the situation juz anyhow scold... ruin the name of Christ... disgusted...

两个人。。。

2008-05-05T23:46:00.002+08:00

两个人的世界很大，但是却容纳不下多一个人。。。

两个人的世界可以很容易快乐，因为只需要对方的一个微笑。。。

两个人的世界可以很静，因为你只能听到对方的声音。。。

两个人在一起可以不说话，因为很多话都可以不用说，对方也能听得到。。。

Hierarchy...

2008-05-02T17:55:00.002+08:00

The problems of a tall hierarchy system... Inefficient... Power culture... Insufficient authority delegation... Environment of fear... Slow decision making... Haiz...

Aarrgghh....

2008-05-02T17:48:00.002+08:00

Aarrgghh.... going mad soon... wrong culture... funny culture... not adapting as fast as I am expecting myself to...

Variety of work: yes...
Authority for decision making: no...
Hierarchy: yes...
Feedback: no...
Flexibility: ok...
Overworked: yes...

Gosh... no wonder the turnover rate is so high...

I am a superwoman so I can overcome... :)

Free...

2008-05-02T10:28:00.002+08:00

Have never felt so free for such a long time... Yesterday was simply juz so enjoyable... doing wateva I want at wateva time I like... went trekking at macRitchie reservior early in the morning with my parents... then slp for a while... then prepare exam qns for my students... then watch tv... then go tuition... then come back and slp again... haha... so shiok lor... nobody to hinder wat I want to do... nobody to take up my time... nobody to complain and make noise about me watching tv or doing my own things... no need to entertain anyone... no need to host anyone... I have my time all for myself... never had this for sooooo long... had all the time in the world to spend time with my family... celebrated my bros' birthday... so fun... watch some silly drama with my bros... laugh like mad... haha... :) this is life...

End of my suffering...

2008-04-27T21:42:00.002+08:00

My sufferings finally came to an end... I am still young anyway... :) I believe there are still nice guys around... there is someone somewhere out there who is my Mr. Right... there will come a day when I will glance upon him under the moonlight and we'll live happily ever after... haha... lol... my fairytale dream... haha... but anyway... I am really alright... in fact, I am very relieved... plz don't worry bout me... I am really doing very well now... :) my exams end on the 6th June so if wanna ask me out, anytime after tt I am good... ;)

...

2008-04-27T21:41:00.001+08:00

Sorry tt I removed my tag box as someone has been spamming some horrible stuff... anything sms me ba... :)

Photo...

2008-04-20T15:07:00.001+08:00

Photo I took on my Genting trip has been uploaded... feel free to take a look in My Photo... :)

Touched... Blessed...

2008-04-09T14:11:00.002+08:00

I am soooo touched and blessed.... One after another.... First, my bf treated me to genting this coming weekend... then my colleagues gave me a necklace for my farewell... so pretty... I have been looking for a pendant for some time and have yet to find one I like and here comes one that is so pretty... gosh... I am soooo blessed.... with my weekend trip on the way, I am not sure wat to expect... juz overflowingly blessed... :)

Mother's words...

2008-04-01T11:56:00.003+08:00

Was talking to mom this morning... seemed to have not spoken to her for a very long time... she said "爱是要付出一切的。。。不求回报的付出。。。完全不自私的付出。。。两个人在一起应该是快乐的。。。如果在一起还没多久就一直吵架，以后还得了？爱不是靠嘴巴说的。。。是靠行动来表示的。。。说爱一个人却又把对方弄得那么累，算爱吗？那么累还要跟他在一起，何必呢？你能撑多久？现在就已经不会体谅你，将来还得了？自己做得到的东西应该自己做。。。真的需要人照顾才叫人帮。。。那tissue而已，自己做不到吗？这样依赖你，你以后会很辛苦的。。。妈妈要看到你幸福。。。不希望你嫁错郎。。。要嫁一个会照顾你的，会体贴你的，会体谅你的。。。嫁一个整天要跟你吵架，整天跟你找麻烦的，嫁来干嘛？不要因为可怜或同情他而跟他在一起。。。这样的感情不会长久的。。。会要就回报，奖励，称赞的付出不是爱的付出。。。如果一个男生真的要为你改，他不会一直拿来讲的。。。他会做给你看。。。你爸爸完全没告诉我说他要改。。。我只是告诉他说你爷爷不喜欢喝酒，抽烟的男生，他二话不说，下一次我见到他的时候，他就全部改掉了。。。你想清楚。。。真的能一辈子的吗？"

Back to Ipoh...

2008-03-25T16:44:00.002+08:00

Went back to Ipoh last Friday with my boyfriend, brother and cousin... really enjoyed the trip... like a honeymoon is preview... :) the trip back was a nightmare... got stuck at the checkpoint for donno how many thousand hours... the Malaysia checkpoint really needs serious improvement... maybe the government should send the staff for training for higher efficiency and set up more barriers to create the queues.... when I arrived at the woodland checkpoint, I got a shock of my life... no air-con, no queue... it was simply a big mess... and the queues hardly move at all... stuffy and all... a kid actually fainted in that horrifying condition... then, the coach I too broke down... the air-con not working so had to wait for a replacement bus to fetch us from the checkpoint... other than the horrible beginning, the rest of my trip was wonderful... arrived at bout 8pm, has a sumptuous dinner then go home slp... the following day even better... slp so much... haha... went to visit my grandma... played with my cousins... then go back slp again... haha... went KTV till donno wat time... very funny... Kenneth really can't sing for nuts... everyone was laughing our heads off hearing him duet with me but it was really fun... it was really touching when he sang for me... :) the food was delicious... I fell asleep on him while they were still singing... I loved the feeling... slept late tt night... woke up early the following morning to go to my grandfather's cemetery... have nvr been there since he passed away in '98... really missed him... went to kampong for brunch... then went to visit my cousin and nieces... so cute... my bro and cousins cooked lunner while Kenneth and I go slp again... haha... old liao... must slp more... haha... then woke up, had lunner then went out to buy dvds... in the end I didn't buy anything but my bro and cousin bought much... waited like nuts for them... so slow... Monday was the best... went shopping for the whole afternoon... bought quite a few things... but the problem is... my bf actually bought more clothes than me... aarrgghh.... haha... but it was quite fun... went round in cab and shopped 3 malls... haha... shiok... but really... my bf's stamina really good... no guy ever shopped for so long with me before and still carried all my things... :) went to my cousin's grandma place for dinner before we left... super nice also... ate to much for the 3 days... jia lat... all the supper and all... haiz... haha... good thing nvr gain too much weight... hee... my love for him really grew by leaps and bounds... he has been like a guardian angle for the whole trip... looking after me in every little detail... even peel the shell of the crab for me... yum yum... :) good thing the period of quarrel is over... :)

I will change...

2008-03-18T11:29:00.002+08:00

I am not sure if I can still trust what you say... you value the things your friend say (if he can even be considered a friend) more than our relationship... he have not even meet me and say that I'll be like this and like that and you actually believe him and cause things to happen supposedly like he said and then threaten to do things that I'll regret if I still continue in my ways... you keep saying that you have enough of tolerating me... maybe now its my turn to let you know that I have been the one tolerating... yesterday night you threaten to break saying that you have had enough... I grant your wish, not wanting to see you suffer anymore for my sake then you say that you don't bear to give this relationship up... so what's what? am I being irreasonable here? am I being ridiculous? I think I am just lost... very lost... don't know what to listen to and what not... don't know what you say and mean it and what you don't... you say that you need me but I feel like trash from the way you treat me... I don't know... I am really not sure what to decide and how to decide... can I still decide... I don't even know what is right...

Good bye, forever...

2008-03-18T00:50:00.002+08:00

I don't wish to say anymore... Maybe I am really not good enough for you... I have too many flaws... Too many things in my character, in me, in my personality that are so wrong... so unacceptable... so difficult for you to bear, to tolerate... thanz for the time, effort and love you have wasted on me... thanz for the times, the happy moments we have had together... sorry for the hurts I have caused... sorry for all the sorries that I didn't want to say... There definitely will be someone out there better than me waiting for you... someone more suitable for you... I love you and will continue loving you till the day my love is drained... My deepest blessing... Good bye, forever, my love...

Communication breakdown...

2008-03-17T23:31:00.002+08:00

I have absolutely no idea wat you are talking about... maybe you also don't know wat you yourself are talking about... only the things that you say count... everything I say are nothing... I have never ever meet such a Nagy guy before... you find things to quarrel then say that I want to quarrel with you... fine... I do things specially for you, say things that are meant specially for you, you doubt me and question that I have done the same for my ex... Do I have the right to be angry? Then you say you give in to me, don't want to quarrel with me... You say that you love me and are not bothered by my past and you promised that you will not dig about my past then you ask about my past then I am not happy then you say that if two person together have to keep secret, everything also cannot ask then together for wat? Then again you say you give in, don't want to quarrel about small issues... lol... then you say you don't like me calling you darling, prefer me to call you dear... I was like ok lor... then you command me "can you just do wat I say"? wat? am i suppose to answer "yes, sir"? For goodness seek... I am not army trained... I speak in layman terms... orh and ok lor all means the same thing as yes... I am a GIRL... girls are girls... maybe guys don't treat orh and ok lor as yes but I am not a guy... I am all so confused... you say that you are not controlling but everytime when we quarrel, I say let forget it, stop quarrelling... you will keep on going on and on and on until you are happy then say ok, forget it and I have to stop... you say "can you just listen to what I say?" then you say "call me after you have cooled down" then before I get to cool down, you will call me and scold me again for the things that you think I am wrong... then I ask "you ask me to call you after I cool down right? can you wait until I cool down then call you?" then you scold me say I little bit only also want to quarrel with you... say I petty... say I stubborn... say I don't give in... what am I suppose to do? what am I expected to do? I clarify the things you say then you say "forget it, if you want to listen you listen, don't want to listen then forget it"? ????? LOST!!!!! what can I do and what can I not do? am I still human? you just have to do whatever you please... do I still have a say in anything? do I actually have a say in anything? you always say that I only want things my way and do things my way... but at the end of the day, things are all done your way... did I have a say? NO!!! I say that its not advisable to call me in the morning cos I am usually moody... you will still call... I say that so long as you change you part, I will change my part... then you did keep you word then you say that you don't dare to trust me cos I did change when I promised to... There are so much injustice and when I voice them out, you say that I want to quarrel with you, I twist my words... Look... Listen... you say that you have had enough of me, enough of me quarrelling with you... say that if I continue to be stubborn and don't do what you say, I will surely regret... :) I tell you... I will have no regret... yes, I love you... there is only that much I can bear... only that much I can tolerate... you don't keep your word then you twist the whole situation around to say that I don't keep my word... I need justice... Somebody give me justice...

Seriously...

2008-03-10T11:35:00.001+08:00

"I seriously warn you!"

"You better change!"

"Don't play with me!"

"You will regret your actions!"

"... ..."

Hurt....

2008-03-10T11:13:00.002+08:00

Hurting...

The cycle of vengence and revenge...

Doing the exact things I did to him...

Bearing the consequences of my actions...

Petty...

Irreasonable...

Illogical...

Ridiculous...

The controlling insist of victimization...

Taking for granted the little precious...

Ignoring valuable advices, bloated with righteousness...

Awaitedness...

2008-02-27T23:52:00.001+08:00

Indeed...

The tug of heart...

Precious kairos...

Futuristic representation...

Miserable...

2008-02-25T10:27:00.002+08:00

So miserable... how on earth are you suppose to survive with an asshole who says and does hurtful things and then brush them off by saying tt "he didn't know what he was doing" or "he didn't know tt it was wrong" or "nobody told him before tt it was wrong"... then when he has a problem with his life, a flaw in character then he refuse to admit it and try to come out with some lousy example to try to twist it around to say tt it is my flaw... when I am nice to him, he doesn't appreciate it and try to say some stupid things to make me angry then say tt I am not nice to him... how many times had I forgiven him for all the mistakes tt he made whether big or small and I don't even talk about them afterwards but then he will bring up the issue and say tt it was my mistakes then say tt I should love him with the love of Christ... Jesus, what will you do if it were you in my situation? I really donno how to handle anymore... I really hate being angry all the time... how would you talk to this kind of ppl? he says tt he wanna change but I donno how to help him... when I try to correct something, he will try to twist it around to make it my mistake... God... How??? I need more love from You... my patience is running low... help me Lord...

Valentine...

2008-02-22T23:35:00.002+08:00

My valentine gift... :)

Back logs...

2008-02-19T10:00:00.003+08:00

Gosh... All my back logs... haha... Start from Valentines' Day ba... :)

14th Feb 2008

Did not go anywhere... Ops... yes... I went to do my nails instead cos he is working... but... he send me a bouquet of purple tulips to my office... touched... :) pictures to be posted soon... went No. 5 for dinner on saturday.. very nice...

15th Feb 2008

Took the driving test... PASSED... haha... stressed... had 2 testers... for no good reason... changed my route big time... got the shock of my life... did not test me on soooo many things... headed back shortly after exit from circuit... thought I failed off hand... was surprised tt I actually passed... haha... no car to drive around... sob sob... :)

16th Feb 2008

Went to watch P.S. I Love You after cell... not really as good as expected... some parts quite touching but I still think the book is better... :) Dinner at No. 5... goody... missed the food there... super nice pizza... crush as thin as paper... lots of fillings... shrime paste chicken... not as good as I remembered it to be but nice nevertheless... :) Singapore Sling... interesting drink... interesting flavour though not to my liking... haha... still prefer my long island... haha...

17th Feb 2008

Shocking day... turning point... enlightenment... disappointment... heartbrokeness... understanding... a breakthrought in itself...

Relief... Release...

2008-02-14T10:53:00.002+08:00

A great sense of relief...

An awesome feeling of release...

I was really shocked by your respond... It was not at all like what I expected... From what I have seen, heard and personally been through... I was seriously shocked and very touched... Touched by your understanding, by so many things... Thankz... Also, sorry... CY told me to tell u early but I was seriously hesitant... I wanted to be transparent but I wasn't sure if I am willing to go through history again... sorry if I hurt u... and also sorry for mis-judging... I am happy now... very, very happy... 祝福我吧！:)

Hmmm...

2008-02-13T10:37:00.001+08:00

Lack of sleep...

Fluctuating emos...

Abundant things to think about...

Unpredictable results...

Undecidable paths...

Change....

2008-02-12T15:56:00.000+08:00

Expecting changes....
Creating changes...
Fearing changes...
Wanting changes...

Sick and tired of the life tt I used to live... Falling in love with this different life tt I now lead... what is good and what is not... weighing the pros and the cons... my libra scale is failing me... neither either nor or... pressure is coming from sea and shore... transparency is a desired fear... yet not wanting to live in the current fear... maybe its not fear I am living in... severe hesitation is more like it... heard much seen much within a short period of time... a resolute decision is not part of the choice... neither here nor there I can't decide... the mental and emotional separation...internal tug-of-war... suddenly wanna believe tt childhood song... hey sarah sarah watever will be will be... wanna disappear from the circumstance but don wanna disappear from the people around... maybe I am thinking too much... :)

...

2008-02-12T15:37:00.000+08:00

nth much to say...

haven't been blogging recently...

busy with the busy-ness of life...

festives... seasons...

changing phase...

new year... new life...

adapting change...

influence... perception...

fluctuating opinion...

Hurt...

2008-01-24T13:57:00.000+08:00

Hurt...

It goes all the way in...

Self-centred, selfish, self-praising...

There is no room in your heart for anybody else other than yourself...

You expect a hell lot from everybody around you but you never stop for one moment to consider that you are not even up to knee level expectation of others...

You ask ppl to think of the things that they say that are not soothing to your ears but you've never considered the spikes that you spit that goes right into the heart of others...

You want to remove the spike in the eyes of others when you have a plank in yours...

Please, for the sake of the people whom you love and those who love you...

Spare a little time to think and feel for those around you...

It hurt them more to see you go astray
Yet in their helplessness
They can only watch you have your way
Having had their say

Thinking that you are always right
Demanding everybody else to be likewise
Giving you love ones no other choice
To accept you or otherwise

In their hurt they constantly pray
Hoping someday you will change
Not necessarily change but just grow up
To start having the feelings of others at heart

The things you do the things you say
Most hurt are those you meant to stay
You think you are the best of them
Pride and ego destroys all man

hmmm... sorry if these sounds very bad but I really need to pen them down before I explode with them... juz so clogged up these days... :)

DDD

2008-01-18T15:41:00.000+08:00

Decided to decide to make the decision...

Its time for me to draw the lines clearly...

Its time for me to set my life in order...

Its time for me to take responsibility of whatever things I do...

Its time for me to be able to bear the consequences of whatever things that happen...

Its a new year...

Gotta start it in a new way...

For better or for worse...

Lets do something different this year...

Do something more daring...

Do something out of the box...

Do something not within my comfort zone to do...

Do something which I will not usually do...

Lets see when Dec 2008 arrives...

If I regret then too bad...

If not then praise the Lord... :)

Thinking...

2008-01-16T15:34:00.000+08:00

Recently, there has been several things to think about...

Thinking of commitment...

Thinking of relationship...

Thinking of priority...

Thinking of responsibility...

Thinking of this...

Thinking of that...

Thinking if I think too much will I have white hair...

Thinking if I don't want white hair I better don't think too much...

Then realized that I have thought more than I should...

Haha...

Getting used...

2008-01-11T10:09:00.000+08:00

Starting to get used to the routine of things... thou different things happen everyday but starting to get used to the working life... the people... the environment... initially, I thought my cg is quite attached... now it seems worse... almost my whole department is attached... gosh... well... considering tt I am the youngest person in the whole office and the age gap is quite significant... *pat* *pat*... haiz... haha... ops... sounded a bit despo... lol... not there yet... haha... I am still young... :)

I wanna get married by 25... lol...

ops... go away devil... I can wait...

you are getting old... buahahaha....

no lor... I am not even 21 yet...

tt's only 4 more years... you sure anybody will like you and want to marry you??

go away and mind your own business... my God will provide...

''''````Ta Da````'''' I win... haha...
Sorry... a bit short circuit recently... haha... :)

Word in season...

2008-01-08T17:08:00.000+08:00

God really works in miraculous ways...

Verse of the day:
Matthew 7:7-8
Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

Exactly what I need to be reminded of... :)

Mental shock...

2008-01-08T16:55:00.000+08:00

Before I get a mental shock...

Before I get a shock of my life...

I need to get my priorities right...

I need to make my stand clear...

I gotta ask God what His will is for my life...

I gotta make sure that God is Lord in all areas of my life...

Is my God your Lord?

If not, then cannot...

Cannot means cannot...

笨蛋。。。

2008-01-07T15:23:00.000+08:00

一堆笨蛋。。。

烦死人了。。。

没有的时候就一个都找不到。。。

现在就突然跑出一大堆。。。

怎么办？

全部都不要吗？

统统都丢掉。。。

然后又再找不到。。。

很笨吧？

哈哈。。。

Undeciding....

2008-01-04T14:23:00.000+08:00

I really wanna agree with what you said but somehow there is juz this stucked feeling in me... I really donno wat to decide on... maybe part of me juz don't wanna decide... maybe should juz let life take its course... at this point of time, I really donno wat is right to do... I choose not to do anything but it doesn't seem to be the best choice either... now its like neither here nor there... haha... so stucked... although I have other things in mind but I am also not very sure if they are heading anywhere... this T-junction really very difficult to decide on which path to take... haiz.... :)

First day of work of the year....

2008-01-02T21:32:00.000+08:00

This year didn't start too bad... well rested to start the year... first day of work of the year was kinda good... not a lot to do... went for a 2 hr lunch with the ppl in my dept... was kinda cool... haha... then half of the time in office, everyone was chit chatting... haha... went for some shopping after work while waiting for my cousin... really enjoyed myself today... a great year ahead... :)